Gentleness - The Strength of Gentleness: Walking in the Spirit's Power

Kate DeMello
May 2
3 min read

Gentleness, in our culture, is often mistaken for weakness. But the gentleness of Galatians 5:22, prautes, is a strength under control, a humble and considerate approach to others, a power wielded with grace. And it's a power that is not inherent in us; it's a fruit of the Holy Spirit's work.

The Depths of ***Prautes*: Power Under Control**

Prautes is a difficult word to translate. It encompasses humility, meekness, considerateness, and a willingness to yield to others. It's not weakness; it's strength under control. Think of a powerful warhorse, trained to respond to the slightest touch of its rider. The horse possesses immense power, but it submits that power to a higher authority. This is the essence of biblical gentleness. It's a strength that is tempered by humility and love. Jesus described himself as "gentle and humble in heart" (Matthew 11:29).

The Counterfeits: The Masks of Weakness and Aggression

We often misunderstand gentleness, either confusing it with weakness or rejecting it in favor of aggression, revealing our need for the Spirit's transformation:

The Doormat: We allow others to walk all over us, believing that this is gentleness. We avoid conflict at all costs, even when it means sacrificing our own needs or allowing injustice to prevail. This is not gentleness; it's passivity and a lack of healthy boundaries.
The Steamroller: We assert ourselves aggressively, using our power or position to dominate others. We might be loud, demanding, or controlling. This is not gentleness; it's arrogance and a misuse of power.
The Manipulator: We use subtle tactics to get our way, perhaps through guilt trips, passive-aggressive behavior, or flattery. This is not gentleness; it's manipulation and a lack of honesty.
The Silent Sulker: We withdraw from others, harboring resentment and bitterness, but we avoid direct communication. This is not gentleness; it's a form of passive aggression.
The People Pleaser: We avoid any type of potential conflict by always acting in a manner we believe is gentle, even when the circumstances call for bold action.

The Spirit's Work: The Source of True Gentleness

The Holy Spirit is the source of true gentleness. He doesn't just "help" us to be gentle; He transforms us, enabling us to embody this virtue:

Humbling Us: The Spirit convicts us of our pride and self-reliance, showing us our need for God's grace. This humility is the foundation of gentleness.
Empowering Us to Yield: The Spirit gives us the strength to yield to others, to put their needs before our own, to forgive offenses, and to respond with grace, even when we've been wronged.
Giving Us Discernment: The Spirit helps us to discern when to be gentle and when to be firm, when to yield and when to stand our ground. Gentleness is not weakness; it's wisdom in action.
Transforming Our Hearts: The Spirit replaces our hearts of stone with hearts of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26), making us more sensitive to the needs and feelings of others.
Interceding: The Spirit intercedes for us, working in the core of who we are, where true gentleness comes from.

Practices for Cultivating Gentleness (Responding to the Spirit):

These are not techniques to achieve gentleness; they are ways to respond to the Spirit's work:

Prayer: Don't pray to become more gentle in a general sense. Pray for the Holy Spirit to fill you, to humble you, to empower you to yield to others in specific situations. Pray for discernment to know when to be gentle and when to be firm.
Scripture Meditation: Immerse yourself in passages that speak of God's gentleness and our call to reflect His character (Psalm 18:35, Isaiah 40:11, Matthew 11:29, 2 Corinthians 10:1, Philippians 2:1-11), allowing the Spirit to shape your understanding of this virtue.
Confession: Confess your pride, your aggression, your manipulation, your passivity. Acknowledge your need for the Spirit's transforming power.
Surrender: Release your desire to control others, your need to be right, your fear of vulnerability. Trust that the Spirit will guide you and empower you to respond with gentleness.
Practice (in the Spirit's Strength): Look for opportunities to practice gentleness in your interactions with others. Listen attentively, speak kindly, respond with grace, even when you're provoked.

Gentleness is not weakness; it's strength under control, a fruit of the Spirit, a reflection of God's character in our lives, a character we can only display through His power and grace.